feelings of awe

when i approach a child, he inspires in me two sentiments;
tenderness for what he is, and respect for what he may become.
- louis pasteur

finn oliver, 5 yrs.

i can't think of more appropriate words to describe how i am feeling about finn right now.
he is still my little boy in so many ways - crawling up in my lap to snuggle on occasion and
still asking for back rubs and a song before bed.
in these moments, i'm reminded of my baby boy.

when i watch him play with scoutie,
my heart is full of joy as he can be the sweetest big brother in the world.
he speaks calmly and respectfully to him (most of the time at least),
enouraging him along as he plays and discovers.
in these moments he is much older.

though there are remnants of my baby boy left,
there is a big boy surfacing now and today was a reminder of this.
christopher and i joined him for kindergarten orientation today at explorer elementary.
it finally hit me that i have a child starting school. i wasn't overwhelmed with sadness,
as i am really excited about this next step, but i have been reflective all day...
on these past 5 years of his life and my life as his mother.

at the school, we were introduced to the director (explorer doesn't use the term principal),
as well as the 3 kindergarten teachers and their partner teachers.
they were all so warm and seemed to truly enjoy teaching and children. it felt good.

although we won't find out for another few days what teacher finn will be assigned to,
i mentioned to c that i don't think we could go wrong with any of them. he agreed.
finn (and parents) left excited as ever and ready to start this new adventure.

august 31st is the big day!!

i truly am in awe of this beautiful little boy who is growing up so fast.