i've found myself observing my firstborn more closely lately.
i discretely tune into a discussion he might be having with a buddy or scout,
or i observe him as he reads or draws in his notebook.
he's growing up so fast. i can hardly get my head around that he's 10
{but he quickly reminds me if i forget}.
finn, here are my observations of you at this age.
"i'm not a baby".
you say this when we offer you the smallest bit of advice.
we know you're not a baby...we know it all too well because we remember the
exact moment you were born, even though it was ten years ago.
ten...it's the most frustrating and exhilarating mix of little-boy-big kid.
you happily play along with scout and his younger friends when they want to do
jedi training, and other times you want to be sit quietly alone somewhere reading
about the international space station or colonizing mars.
you'll remind me that you can use the bathroom in public spaces alone,
and can take scout whenever he has to go, that you can use the stove,
and that you are only 3 years away from being a teenager which means you can
get your own cell phone. still, you think girls are gross.
you download your homework and work independently, email your buddies and auntie jen,
fearlessly grab a surfboard and head straight into the ocean, yet you still hug and kiss
your dad and me openly and ask for a backrub every night before bed.
when our family dog-sits brooklyn, you wake up every morning on your own and take her
for a walk and even pick up her poop. the same day, you'll play with army men on your
bedroom floor and later wonder how santa can live so long. is he immortal you ask?
you can explain the big bang theory without missing a beat and get annoyed because we
won't let you be stay home alone yet, you cried tears when you missed the firework
show on the 4th of july. {we watched sea world's up-close the following night}
life is full of contradictions.
we can hardly believe you are ten years old,
that you've been with us for a whole decade,
and that our lives existed before you at all.
and the irony is our time with you is really about preparing you to leave us,
so you can step into the adult world confidentially and contribute to this beautiful
place we call home. oh how we love you finn oliver.
