Scout is Twelve

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are grey. 
You’ll never know dear, how much I love you, oh please don't take my sunshine away.

Our youngest family member is TWELVE today and as I watched him run through the house finding clues scattered about for a scavenger hunt his Aunt Jen so thoughtfully and lovingly created for his special day, this song came into my head. It was a favorite of Scout’s for many years. He’d ask me to sing it to him every night before we would read when he was little and sometimes I'd make up verses with his name in the song. He loved it. I no longer sing out loud to him, but the evenings are still special. We catch up on the day and he shares whatever is on his mind, then we read together. I know these days won’t last forever, but if I'm lucky, I'm hoping for a few more.

Scout, as my tradition continues, here are 12 things I want to remember about you at age 12.

1. Soccer is still a love of yours  Your love of soccer hasn’t waned at all over the years.  If anything, it continues to grow.  Driving home from practice one evening, you told me you couldn’t imagine life without soccer. I believe that’s true for you. You play 3-4x a week and you watch professional soccer every chance you get. You love the game and everything about it – the competition, the skill involved, the physicality of the game, and being part of a team. In the early part of the Summer, your soccer club gave players 4 weeks off.  By the end of the second week, you told me you were feeling ‘out of shape’ and asked if I’d run around our neighborhood with you. I agreed, although not excited about it as our neighborhood is hilly. As expected, you left me in the dust. I remember the days and years of running slower so you could stay with me, and then running side by side.  Not anymore.  Soccer had made you not just happy, but super fit. You can run forever it seems before getting tired.
   You continue to play with Albion Soccer Club (ASC), the top competitive club here in San Diego and are thrilled that your best friend, Spencer, tried out and made it on your team. You have moved up a level from last year, and are now on the Boys 2007 NPL (National Players League). This Club requires us to travel outside of San Diego a bit which isn’t always fun or easy for your family, but we want to support you in what you love. Your dad and I aren’t those parents who push their kids to play something competitively. We enjoy our weekends and would have been perfectly happy attending local games and saving money, but you wanted more. Soccer if YOUR thing and we want to support you. When and if you want to be done, we will be ok with this, but will ask you to replace it with some type of physical activity. Your dad and I would love to play a little more tennis with you. 
2.  You enjoy school
   It’s Summer and you are out of school and thoroughly enjoying your break. I haven’t heard you say you are ready to go back to school like you used to when you were in elementary school.  Still, you do enjoy school, and especially enjoyed your first year of Middle School. I asked what you enjoyed the most and you said the Freedom – not having to stand in lines all the time, being able to go to the restroom without getting permission (just letting them know), and a few other things I can’t think of right now. Academically, school still comes easy for you…it always has. You take after your dad in this way, and my brothers, your Uncle Randy and Uncle Todd. There is one class you don’t enjoy…art. You said you would skip it if you could. You did say you 'appreciate' art which I loved hearing. What happened to that little boy that loved to color and paint as a preschooler I ask?
   
   Your favorite subject is still math and has been for the last few years. You enjoy finding multiple ways to solve problems…sometimes a half dozen more than you’ve been asked for by your teacher. Your teachers do their best to challenge you so that you continue your love of learning.  You aren’t even a teen, but you are slightly concerned about what you are going to study in college. Finn told you that you should start 'thinking' about it and though it can’t hurt to ‘think’ about it, I tried to assure you there is lots of time. You are only just 12. By high school, it would be nice to have an idea of what field you would like to go to. It can help make your college years more productive and meaningful.
3. You are a kind kid
   This is my absolutele Favorite thing about you Scout!! You have a BIG heart and genuinely care about people. Caring comes naturally to you and people are drawn to you because of this and your authenticity. You have lots of friends, a handful of very close friends and one best friend. I watch you interact with all of them and I see how you pick up on subtle things…their expressions, body language, etc. How you ask them about things that you don't necessarily enjoy but you know are important to them. Maybe this is because you spend a lot of time with them and know them so well, but more than this, I really think you pay attention, and genuinely care to connect. This serves not just your friendships well, but our family too. You look for very specific ways to show you care about each of us. You know each of our love languages.
4.  You absolutely adore our dog and she loves you
   Bonita is loved by the entire family, but it’s clear, you are her boy Scout. I found a quote recently that said “everyone thinks they have the best dog in the world…and they’re right”.  It’s SO true….our animals, like our children, become our absolute favorite. I can’t get over how quickly our fur baby has grown to love us and us her. We are all completely smitten by her! It’s been just over a year now since you picked her out of the little yard where all the rescue pups were, and we just threw her a 3^rd birthday celebration at Kate Sessions Park. You worried about her not being “comfortable” when I tried putting a birthday hat on her (again your big heart). She would only wear it for seconds anyway until she pulled it off. You are responsible with her…taking her for a walk every morning, and afternoon (this summer) and sometimes in the evenings if Finn or I are gone. Though Bonita has taken to sleeping at the foot of your parent’s bed most nights, if momma isn’t home until late, she will climb in bed with you.
5. Your appetite is starting to get biggerYou are growing and have started eating more. You want larger portions and if I don’t give them to you, you come back asking for more. You are growing and though you don’t recognize it, your dad and I do. Your favorite meal is still an In-n-Out Burger – double double cheese, and you still love butter popcorn which I only allow on weekends because you would eat it every night if this rule didn’t exist. You still love chocolate, and your favorite chocolate bar is Hershey Cookies and Creme. As you’ve gotten older you are starting to try more foods which makes life easier for everyone. I remind you and Finn that food should be approached like life - be adventurous with it. Unless you have a crazy allergy, try everything. You’ve tried sushi again since it’s your besties favorite. You still don't love it, but you hey, you stay open to new kinds. *cheer*
6.  You have good friendsYour bestie, Spencer, has been living abroad for the past 3 years, but he is home now and life is better than ever for you. You’ve missed him, but you two would use Google Chat every week over the last 3 years, and of course you visited once and he’s been back to San Diego to visit a few times. Though no one could ever replace Spencer, you developed other strong friendships. Your dad and I admire that you gravitate towards kids who are fairly mature and who make good decisions. I’ve learned over the years, to let you decide who your friend group will be because you have shown me that you chose good friends. You remind me sometimes that I forced you to invite a few kids to one of your birthday parties years ago…even at your prompting me not to invite them. Because I liked their mother (or father), I just assumed they’d behave ‘well enough’.  You were adamant they wouldn’t and that I was making a mistake, but I didn’t listen. Well, I learned from that crazy experience to listen to you Scout. You have good judgement. I only hope your awareness continues through your teen years. You and Spencer have been great friends to and for each other since you were in first grade, and if the last 5 years of any indicator of what’s to come, your friendship might just last a lifetime. Who knows, maybe you two will be each other’s Best Man someday. For now, I just wish for what every mother wants, that you surround yourself with friends who are kind, share similar goals and who are positive influences in your life.
7.  You love sleepovers
   You are a social kid and want to be around your friends alot. That means you invite your friends over every weekend or want to sleepover at their home every weekend. During the Summer, your dad and I are very generous. You've probably had 2-3 sleepovers a week for the past 2 1/2 months. I feel like we have a 3rd or even a 4th son when Finn has friends sleeping over at the same time. I stock up on lots of snacks but make sure your friends eat a healthy dinner at least so parents will allow them to return. I remember your Grandpa Shappard not understanding the sleepover thing when I was a young girl. When I would ask, he would reply with something like "you spent the ENTIRE day with your friend, why does she have to sleep over". Grandma would say, she just does and would usually talk him into it. With 7 kids at home or even 5, I get it now. I'd likely say the same thing. Because you are one of 2 kids, your dad and I are alot more open to sleepovers. The added benefit - it's a great way for me to get to know your friends better and for their parents to know you. 
8. You love video games
   This is literally the ONLY thing that causes friction between you and me right now. For a myriad of reasons, you boys love video games…the stimulation, challenge and competition and now, the social aspect of it since you can play games in ‘real time’ with your friends a nd talk to them. Your dad and I still don’t (and won’t) get any gaming consoles, but you and your brother play games on your computers. We let you play video games, but we limit 'recreational' time to 2 hours a day...this includes video games. There are days when we get busy and don’t keep a pulse on it and have found you on it hours later. This causes problems as we don’t want to police you and Finn. We want you boys to have the discipline to do this on your own. Somedays you do a great job, setting a timer and ‘announcing to us’ that you’ll be gaming until a specific time, and then get off at that time, but not always. Summers are harder and since I'm not home.  Your dad has to oversee this and it's not always easy. He's much more patient than I am.
9. You desperately want a phone
   You’ve been asking for a phone since last year when you started middle school (6^th grade). You were 11 and told your dad and that ALL the kids had phones and that you think you were the ONLY kid who didn’t have one. I didn’t believe this and did a little investigating.  It appears the majority of 6^th graders do have phones, but our family rule is you boys could get one when you turned 13. Unlike kids who bike or walk to school, you and your brother are driven to school every day by your dad. Since you don’t attend our neighborhood schools and do this, we don’t see a real need. You’ve made a case for needing one since you play soccer and get dropped off at the field, and I reminded you that if everyone has a phone, then you can easily borrow one, and call me if you need to. You did this once when I was 5 minutes late. You borrowed your coach’s phone and I told you I was right around the corner. I asked you once what you would do with a phone the majority of the time, and you answered honestly and said, I’d probably play games. I appreciated your honest Scout. I know you well and you don’t need one. I know some parents buy their kids phones out of guilt or are afraid they will be “left out socially” but NOPE. Your dad and I won’t fall into this. We believe a part of your success is because we are stricter with technology than most parents. Sure, it would have been  easy to give you an iPad when you were little to keep you entertained, but instead, we decided against this and gave you book. We are convinced your love of books and your ability to focus, is because you were given books at a young age, instead of games or movies. Hang in there Scout. You will get a phone when you become a teenager.
10.  You enjoy earning money
    Your dad and I don’t give you and Finn allowance, but we allow you both to earn money by doing things above and beyond your normal household chores. A few weeks ago, you asked how you could earn some money. In the past, some of chores included picking up leaves from our Magnolia tree, swiffering the floors or dusting all the books in our library. You are saving money to buy a new graphic/video card for your computer as the one you have is really old and slow. You had Spencer over and I suggested washing the two giant glass sliding doors that overlook the backyard. You and Spencer grabbed Windex, two rolls of paper towels and a stool and went to work. It was a HUGE job that took probably 2 hours, and you earned $5 apiece. I was a happy mamma as this is one chore I’ll gladly pay someone to do. You also earn money by watching our neighbors chickens.  You are also in the middle of getting your certification to be a line referee at soccer games and tournaments. You’ve been talking about this for years as they pay anywhere from $12 to $15 a game. Since you love the game and already know all about it, it’s an easy way for you to make extra money. By tomorrow, you will have completed the 18 on-line tests, and then will have to take a test on the field with a senior referee.  I’m so proud of you Scout.
11.  You enjoy playing the pianoYou’ve been playing piano for about 5 years now and though your days are full, you still squeeze in practicing a little bit each day…or almost every day. I used to insist you play a specific amount of time, but I stopped doing this. You play when you can and some days it’s 5 minutes and others day you might play for an hour. I just remind you that piano lessons aren’t free…that playing the piano is a privilege that many don’t have and wish they did. I think you understand, and if you don’t fully now, you will someday.  Music is fun for you, but it’s not your passion. I know this. I’m just happy you play. Currently, you are learning to play This is Me from the musical, The Greatest Showman. It’s a tough song to play…fast paced and has your hands bouncing all over the keyboard, but you chose it.  It’s been about 3 months since you started learning it and though you have the notes down now, you are working on the tricky timing.  I love listening to you play Scout and enjoy having music fill our home. I also love singing alongside you….though you don’t like me doing this when you are first learning a song because it “messes up your concentration”.  I understand this and try to refrain, but it’s hard as I love to sing out loud. I’m looking forward to recording you and sharing the song you’ve been on working on with family and friends who support you in your music.
12. A few random things about you
    You like to style your hair…especially before school. You typically add a little gel or styling wax to your thick hair and it holds it in place for the day.
    You love wearing tee shirts, soccer jerseys and fuzzy pajamas to bed. It’s summer time and you still put on your fuzzy pajamas after you get out of the shower or bath. You take them off to sleep, and then put on again in the mornings. The mornings can be cool in San Diego, but in mid-Summer it’s not THAT cool. You tell me you LOVE being cozy. I get this. No matter what age we are, it’s nice being cozy and having soft fabric against our skin.
    You also love baths. You are my mini me in alot of ways, and this is one of them. After soccer practice and soccer games, you will literally draw yourself a hot bath to relax in. It’s one of your favorite things. If you are in a rush, you will shower, but the tub is one of your happy places.

I am grateful for SO many things you bring to my life and into our family Scout – your passion, your sense of humor, your love of learning and for life and your BIG ol' heart.  You make our home a more beautiful place and we are all grateful for you every single day. I can’t promise you I’ll be here for the rest of your life, but I can promise to love you for the rest of mine.

Always and forever,

Mom

Your stats at age 12:

You are 57” tall and weigh 72 pounds.

You wear a size 10 in jeans and shirts (thought they are both a bit big but 8s are too small).
You wear a size 4 shoe. 

scout's on his way to middle school

May you have auspiciousness and causes of success
May you have the confidence to always do your best
May you take no effort in your being generous
Sharing what you can, nothing more nothing less
May you know the meaning of the word happiness
May you always lead from the beating in your chest
May you be treated like an esteemed guest
May you get to rest, may you catch your breath...
~ i want you to have it all, jason mraz

these are some of the lyrics to the song that is used in the
background to this video (below) celebrating scout's elementary years.
originally, he asked that i use the school's theme song by cat steven song
titled, if you want to sing out. it's a beautiful song with an important message,
one that students learn in kindergarten and it's sung multiple times at special
events throughout the year. it's more of a mellow song and it didn't quite go
with the images i had pulled together. scout watched and agreed.  i asked
him for suggestions and he immediately said, how about the new jason mraz song.
he's been listeing to jason his entire life. he hears me play and sing it often.
we watched the video together with the new song and agreed, it was perfect.

it took several weekends of an hour here and there to create, but the
memories that this video captures are priceless. this is what life is all
about - making memories with those you love. 

explorer elementary has given scout a wonderful second home the past
6 years, but he's ready for bigger challenges that middle school brings.
like the lyrics cry out, i want him to 'have it all.  i don't mean material things.
i want him to have the things that money can't buy - confidence, close friendships,
excitement for learning and life and rich experiences.  

newly eleven - scout benjamin gerber

we have a birthday boy in the house today! Scout is ELEVEN and my mama heart couldn’t be happier to celebrate our youngest. I can’t possibly list all the reasons why I love this kid, but I will list a few. scout loves life and this spills over to everything he does. he inspires me with his love for learning, how he relishes reading and being read aloud to, how he pushes himself academically and physically and how he shows kindness and compassion for people and animals. it was no surprise that our new fur baby, bonita, bonded best with Scoutie. last, he shows us all to how to love big, forgive, and that it’s ok to wear our hearts on our sleeve. Our family is thanking heaven for our sweet eleven year old and all that he is.

scout - in keeping with tradition, here are 11 things i want to remember about you at this age:

1. You have a heart of gold

you have a big heart that truly feels all the feelings. you've always felt things deeply which makes you more attuned to those around you. this benefits everyone who comes in contact with you because this generation more than ever, needs examples of people who aren't afraid to be 'seen'. boys often learn to hide their vulnerabilities so they aren't seen as being weak. my hope is you understand that showing vulnerability is a sign of strength. it's allowing yourself to be seen and heard and this is a beautiful thing. the best relationships in life consist of this so keep that big heart of yours scout. it's one of your best characteristics. 

2. You enjoy being a child

your brother can hardly wait to be an adult, but you enjoy every minute of childhood and almost mourn growing older. leading up to your birthday every year, you tell me how great it has been being the age you are. you tell me why it's been the best year of your life so far, and that you wish you didn't have to grow older. your words tug gently at my heartstrings because as a mother, it's bittersweet for me to watch you blow out more and more candles every year. i've loved EVERY age you've been and i love your age now, but as the years pass, i wish i could hit a pause button for both of us. unfortunately, that's not the way the world works, so remember, you will only be 11 once, so make this your best year yet!

3.  You might be the most ticklish kid alive

our family has been torturing you with tickling ever since you were a preschooler.  because you are so sensitive to it and have the best laugh when we tickle you, we can't help ourselves!  your entire 5th grade class knows how ticklish you are and they too have enjoyed hearing you laugh, scream and squeal during recess when they 'torture you with tickling'. you even told me you can tickle yourself.  is this even possible? 

4. You still relish reading and the written word

i read once that reading is the easiest way to open a child's world and scout, your world is wide and vast because of the all reading that you do. c and i are far from being perfect parents, but reading is one thing we are proud you boys both enjoy. we've encouraged it your entire lives and it's benefited you in a million different ways. sure your vocabulary and spelling are off the charts which has everything to do with your love of reading, but there are more subtle things too.  reading has given you the ability to discuss many different topics with a variety of people of all ages reading has helped you to focus which helps you in everything from school to playing sports. last, it's given us a way to deeply connect as son and mother because i too share your passion for books. i enjoy hearing about all the stories you read and discussing stories we read aloud together almost every night. we just finished reading wonderstruck by brian selzniak and were mesmerized by this slow unfolding drama of a book. a movie has also been made off it too. {of course the book is 10x better}. someday i'll dedicate to post to your favorite books.  perhaps one day when you become a father, you'll have a record of your all-time favorite books and can recommend to him or her. i know i know, that's like a million years off you'd say, but remember, parents view time very differently than children.

5.  You are a true soccer player
there's been lots of changes this past year for you. even after receiving the Most Valuable Player {MVP} award this past season playing for the Blast Soccer Club, you begged us to try out Albion, a higher ranked soccer club here in san diego. after lots and lots of discussion between your father and i, we decided to let you try out and you made it for the 2nd level {i'll come back and fill out the official name once i talk to you}. the season is still new, but so far so good.  you travelled to las vegas and took 2nd place in your division last weekend.  i may be slightly biased, but even if i just saw you playing on a soccer field, i think i would notice you scout. you don't score the most goals or have the fanciest footwork on the field {although your skills are pretty impressive}. i'd notice you because of your 'intensity'...the way you focus when you are on the field and how smart you play. your coaches tell us you have high 'soccer intelligence' which translates to you understand the game...you see the field and options for moving the ball down the field. i wish i could say i taught you some of this, but i take zero credit. soccer is something YOU own....it's not something your dad and i push at all. we simply support you. the love and the drive you have comes from within.  your dad and love watching you play and have actually learned more about the game than we ever would have if you hadn't joined our family.

6. you're a great friend

this summer, your bestie, spencer, returned to san diego from barcelona and you boys are as happy as clams! he is here with his family for 6 weeks and you two have picked up right where you left off.  i was curious to see if your friendship might fade a bit because of the time and distance between you, but this hasn't happened. you two stay in touch regularly using skype and google hangouts. you two are committed friends and the effort is made on both sides....the sign of true friendships.  the summer of 2018 promises to be one of your best ones yet. in just a week and a half, there has already been a few sleepovers, birthday celebrations {for both you and spencer}, soccer playing and soccer watching {world cup}, book exchanges and you've got a big surfing/camping trip to mexico planned with your dad and finn and spencer and his dad and brother.  i have no doubt you'll return home with lots of new books read, a sun-kissed body, a big smile on your face and stories that will last for years to come.  

7.  You are a burger boy

like most kids you enjoy pizza and for your recent birthday celebration, we bought boxes of pepperoni pizza to feed you and your buddies, BUT if you had a choice, you'd prefer a burger from in-n-out almost any day of the week. your order is always the same: a double double cheese with a chocolate shake. as you grow and eat more, i will often take you here on the days you have soccer practice. you practice from 6-7:30pm and are starving when you finish so we'll stop at in n out to fill your belly. it makes you happy and though burgers aren't the healthiest food, i justify the stop by telling myself the burgers are a little better than other fast food joints becuase the beef is never frozen. the burgers are cooked fresh upon order. you told me you might even work here as a teenager because you hear the pay is well over minimum wage AND you get a free meal every shift you work.  i might just start calling you 'burger boy'. 

8. Math is your favorite subject

some might thing english is your favorite subject because you are an avid reader, but math is your favorite subject. it comes pretty easy for you. it may not always be this way, but it has been since the beginning, so we supplement alot from home {you still do kahn academy every year}. you finished 6th grade halfway through your 5th grade year and spend the rest of the year 'reinforcing' what you learned. you've had amazing teachers throughout your elementary school years and they've done a great job challenging you. i'll be honest, i struggled a bit helping you with a recent word problem you presented to me.  your math is becoming more complicated and you are finding that your father is a stronger in this area than your mom.

9. You had your first puberty class

a few months ago, you brought home a permission slip that your father and i needed to sign to allow you to - attend a class on puberty.  i could only think 'wow - that came fast. we of course signed the permission slip and briefly told him what they would be discussing. he didn't seem interested or perhaps that was his way of saying i don't want to hear this from you, but he now knows what to expect when he starts puberty. if you had your way, you would stay a child forever. you actually said this. i believe childhood goes by too fast scout, and though it's tons of fun having babies that coo and smile at us and toddlers who think we are superheros, it's also a beautiful watching you grow and come into your own. puberty is probably 2 years away yet, but it's coming. i bought you deodorant since you are starting middle school this year. even if you don't need to use it, it's good to have it on hand. 

10. You love legos, battle bots, superhero/marvel movies and of course watching professional soccer matches 
you are a busy kid scout with full days. i don't worry about you sitting in front of a tv for days on end...unless it's the world cup. when you do get some down time, it means you are watching something that I typically have no interest in. living with 3 boys means it's rare that i watch tv because we only have one and it's usually tuned to something sports or science related. i retreat to the guest bedroom and watch something on my laptop from time to time. this is part of living in a BOY house. 

11. You are a boy who has a dog...finally!

for the last 3-4 years, you've mentioned wanting a dog. after spending two weeks with grandma's dog maggie in florida, you were hooked. you didn't ask for one every day, you simply mentioned it a few times a year....when we would see a friendly or cute dog or visit friends with dogs. because your father and i were both working out of the house, neither of us felt it was right to leave a dog at home alone all day. our hope was that down the road, our circumstances might be different and there might be an opportunity to be dog owners. then there was. your dad took a job that has allowed him to work from home all-day full time if he wants and usually he does. we finally had an opportunity without feeling like bad pet owners.  

there were a few conditions before we added a furry family member to our group: the first being that we would not get a puppy as they require more work than a older dog. we weren't ready for chewing, house-training, etc. we simply don't have the time or the energy. second, christopher and i didn't want a dog that would shed. we clean enough at home and cleaning more was not something we wanted to be doing. the third request from ALL you boys is that we RESCUE a dog...not buy one.  this too was reasonable, as there are so many dogs {and cats} that need homes. we aren't so particular that we have to have a specific breed. the healthiest dogs are often the mutts and we were ok with this.

so a few weekends ago, you and i drove to our local petco store scout. every other weekend, there is some rescue agency parked in front of the store hoping to find good homes for their animals. i immediately saw a mid-sized black poodle that might have been a good fit, but someone was already filling out paperwork to adopt her. as i scanned the fenced in play yard looking at all the dogs...and there were lots, you discovered a small salt and pepper schnauzer in the corner shaking. she was very cute with a black face and a white moustache and white eyebrows.  the volunteer picked her up and put her in your arms. she was such a timid and a bit scruffy, but she was gentle and you fell in love scout. you literally didn't put her down for 45 minutes. when i asked if you wanted to hold another dog, you said "no. this is the dog i want mom. she needs a good home".  she wasn't exactly what i was envisioning, but you had made up your mind. i took a photo of you and bonita and sent to christopher letting him know we found our newest family member. to be sure our family and home was the right fit for her long-term, we did the 'foster to adopt' program. we are now on the 4th week and it's official - bonita is ours and we are hers. she has been such a beautiful addition to our home. her tail is no longer between her legs - it's wagging and she seems very happy with us. she especially loves sleeping in your bed scout. you have wanted a dog before you turned 11, and you discovered that sometimes birthday dreams do come true. 

happy birthday sweet scout about! there isn't a day that goes by that i'm not grateful to be your mom.

Your stats at 11 years old:

you are 54" tall and weigh 68 lbs. 

you wear a size 8 in jeans and a size 10 shirt. 

your shoe size: 3.5 and sometimes 4 shoe

scout's 10th birthday celebration

to usher in his double digit birthday, scout really wanted a trampoline party.
he LOVES trampolines {like his momma}, but i was a little surprised he chose this because
he spends so much time jumping on his buddy dash's trampoline. i thought he might have
grown tired of it, but his love for jumping hasn't waned a bit.

since double digit birthdays are really special, and he's never had anything but backyard or park
birthday parties, i agreed to this off-site party. he had gone to get air for a friend's party,
and wanted to go there so i booked.  scout invited all his closest buddies,
with the exception of his bestie spencer who is living in spain. 

so on july 10th, the birthday boy got breakfast in bed and got to choose his menu.
he chose pancakes with blueberries, strawberries, whipped cream and bacon.
finn woke up early and helped me pull out the serving tray and arrange the fruit.
we carried it into his room pretty early because both boys had to be at jr. lifeguards
by 8:30am. scout was sound asleep as we entered the room singing happy birthday softly.
he sat up smiling with his tousled hair standing on end. after watching scout eat for a while,
finn ran back to the kitchen to get a little plate of food and brought into scout's room and sat
on the opposite end of his bed to keep scout company. we then watched our double digit kid
open cards and gifts from the family.

this past weekend, scout's birthday party finally happened! his friends from school and the neighborhood
were dropped off at our home mid-morning, and mr. g and i shuttled them to the trampoline park in two vehicles.
for 2 hours, the boys jumped, flipped, wrestled and played dodgeball. watching them made it clear to me why waiver's
are required for all jumpers. when the boys weren't playing dodgeball, they were taking turns jumping and flipping into
a giant pit of foam squares. it looked like so fun, I decided i had to give it a try. c wanted nothing to do with it
{he didn't grow up with a trampoline and thinks they are dangerous}. *sigh* i grew up with a trampoline so they don't phase me at all.
i'd love one in our backyard if we could find space for it. as i watched the boys flip into the pit, one after another, i admit, i was scared,
but since i had an audience of boys cheering me on, i got the confidence to do it. the boys, especially my three, were impressed their
middle age mom/wife did it. i was impressed i did it too {without injury}.  what a fun day. scout wants to have a mom/son date here
 in the future and i told him we will definitely be back.


after the trampoline park, c and i shuttled the boys home for cake and to swim and do a little archery. even though the boys had eaten
4 pizzas an hour earlier, they had no problem eating desert. christopher brought out the cake that he baked and decorated for scout.
there had been  discussion on whether the cake should be a trampoline, but in the end, they decided on a simple target cake,
since scout has been enjoying archery in the backyard so much. scout chose german chocolate for the simple round cake that c decorated
with white frosting and m&ms to make the bull's-eye and surrounding colored rings. it turned out beautifully!  i can't begin to describe
how much scout loved his cake.he was literally beaming when he saw his dad's final creation.
some photo highlights:

scout benjamin: our double digit kid

i can't believe i'm 10. it feels a little weird being double digits now.
- scout benjamin gerber




scout, today, you are celebrating your first double digit birthday. leading up to your big day, you said that you couldn't believe you were turning 10!  you said you loved being 9 and hoped 10 would be as good. i feel the same way. nine was wonderful, with so much growth emotionally. you've gone from a little boy to a big boy and it's been pure joy watching you grow. 
my tradition continues with a special birthday post to you. here are TEN things i want you to remember as you enter this next phase of your life:


1.  You have a heart of gold. if i asked you what your superpower is, you might tell me it's your soccer skills, or that you are great at math or spelling. it's true, you are good at these things, but i'd say your superpower is your sensitivity. you feel everything tremendously scout: time passing, memories, love and loss. just last night, we found your childhood blanket in the hall closet. you held it close and told me how many memories you have of that blanket. your eyes were a little watery as you shared one with me. oh scout, hold on to this part of yourself...don't let society tell you that has to be stuffed down or hidden. you can be strong and feel everything. in fact, feeling makes you stronger. keep that big heart of yours as you grow - it illuminates all those in it's path.
  

2. You don't give up - your dad and i know this, and your teachers, coaches and instructors recognize this as well. they admire your ability to focus and how determined you are. your 3rd/4th grade teacher {same teacher}, said you had "tenacity". whether you are doing khan academy, learning spanish, memorizing a recital piece, or learning a new soccer skill, you don't give up until you get it. sometimes it takes a few hours, a few weeks, months or even a year or longer for something really difficult. you are still working on mastering the rainbow {a soccer skill}, but you will stick to something until you get it. you seem to intuitively know that it doesn't matter how many times you fail, the important thing is to get right back up and try again. i hope this is something that you will do throughout your life scout. it will serve you well.


3.  You learned to whistle - Every year brings lots of firsts, and this year, you learned to whistle. you are pretty proud of yourself. you and your father are the only ones in the house that can do it. one day you simply announced you couldn't whistle and started practicing. you weren't a natural, but you kept at it for weeks until you got it. now you can whistle beautifully and can carry a tune. the star wars and star trek themes are your current favorites, and i know that when you are whistling, you are in a good mood. you promised to teach me to whistle one of these weekends. {i wish you luck son}


4. You still love to read. you've been reading for 6 years now scout, and your vocabulary and reading comprehension surpassed our new president's several years ago{no exaggeration}. you still eagerly share that jk rowling's harry potter series sparked your love of reading and it's the best series ever written! the first time you read it was in 1st grade and you've read the entire series four times since then. you never grow tired of it and I vow to get you and your brother to the wizarding world of harry potter at universal studios in hollywood this fall. other favorites books series of yours are: the unwanteds, the mysterious benedict society, and the ranger's apprentice.  you still bring a book with you every where you go and you don't care what others might think about your sitting in the large part of the shopping cart at target reading while i shop and push you around. i'll visit the home décor aisle to get you a pillow for your back to make you comfortable, and you read away. you often get interrupted by mothers saying how refreshing it is to see a child with their head in a book rather than electronics and you smile and go back to your reading. it's nothing new for you...it's just the way it's always been. on those rare occasions you don't have a book, i will give you my phone, but it's the exception. {like most males, you still detest shopping so i try not to bring you out with me when i have errands to run}


5. You travelled to Barcelona - after your best friend, spencer, moved to spain, we decided to save and visit him during spring break this year. what a trip we had! though the food and architecture didn't excite you like it did your mom, seeing your best friend again was a bit of heaven for you. spencer greeted us at the airport with his parents with a sign that said ' welcome to barcelona scout and angela'. i am sure you will never forget this trip, and i will never forget the look on your face as you reunited with your buddy. the highlights of this trip for you was attending school with spencer {you even wore a uniform}and going to a professional soccer game.  you saw fc barcelona play sevilla and win 3-0. lionel messi scored 2 of the goals and suarez scored one with a backwards bicycle kick that was truly AMAZING!  even this middle-aged momma was impressed.


6. Soccer is your passion - this is your 3rd year of competitive soccer. you played with riptide your first year and then moved to blast which is more local. your love for the game hasn't slowed down even an teensy bit. if anything, it grows stronger by the day. you are passionate about it scout - playing, watching, and learning everything you can about the sport. every parent wants their child to find their passion. there's nothing more gratifying to us when our children do, and you my son, have found yours. this may change from soccer to something else someday, but i hope you always have passions. they make life more meaningful and interesting. your dad and i will support whatever it is that excites you. for now that's soccer and it's been fun seeing your growth and maturity over the past year. when you lose a game, you still get angry or sad {depending on the situation}, BUT there are no more verbal outbursts from you and no big bursts of tears. you feel deeply, but you stay composed on the field. we are proud of you scout, but more importantly, you are proud of yourself. you've come a long way.


7. You love chocolate and are highly ticklish - you love all types of chocolate, but twix candy bars are your favorite! snickers and kit kat are the runner ups. you also are crazy ticklish and not just under your arms or your ribs either. you are ticklish practically EVERYWHERE and this makes it rather tricky to give the massages you ask for after jr. lifeguards or soccer practice. you ask for one but then you giggle and jump up as soon as i touch you. we work around it by me using the 'karate chop' method on your back. oh scout when we want to torture you, we all know what to do - we tickle you!!


the last are just things i want you to be aware of as you go from little boy to big boy:


8.  Pay attention to your life - you do a pretty good job of this now, finding ladybugs or snails that the rest of us just walk right by. you use the word 'savor' alot, and when you eat your dessert slowly, you tell the family you are "savoring" it, just like you do with the easter candy you still have. oh scout, hold on to this because life goes by fast. you are beginning to see this as you say goodbye forever to your single digit years. there is SO much to notice in the every day moments. as you get older, life will get busier and more complicated, but i encourage you to slow down like you do now and notice things. when we pay close attention to our experiences and our feelings, we are rewarded with fuller days and richer memories.


9. Never feel entitled - you don't struggle with this scout, but in a world where kids are overindulged and helicoptered, i wanted to list this because there is nothing worse to me than entitlement - in a child or an adult. your father and i have tried to teach and model for you how to work hard for everything you want - whatever that is. we expect you to carry your weight at home as part of our family. we know when things are handed to us or come too easily, and can't appreciate them the same way we do when we work hard for them. we hope your motivations will be for things that bring meaning to your life. if our family has a motto, it's "people and experiences are important, things aren't". though material things are nice and make our lives comfortable, we want you to always feel you have enough because you do. we are extremely fortunate to live as we do every day and we want you to recognize this. we have way more than we need. as a family, we make an effort to show gratitude - in the language that we use, to volunteering occasionally, and even sending thank you notes. all these little things are important - they bring an attitude of gratitude, teach you responsibility and ward off the entitlement monster.

10. Know you are loved, always - messing up is part of life buddy. you are going to make mistakes - lots of them. we all do. the point is to learn from them, let them go and start over. your dad and i will always love you, even when you behave in ways that we don't love. we encourage you to forgive others when they mess up. we also want you to try and surround yourself with friends who lift you up and make good choices, and who share similar values as you. you are still young and finding your way scout. don't let mistakes freeze you in your tracks. admit them, grow from them and move on. we do this as your parents every day, and you still love us, so be assured that when you make mistakes, we will still love you too...always.


happy birthday double digit kid!! you inspire our family in so many ways, including your big brother. {just re-read the birthday card he gave you}. we're lucky to have you as our youngest family member. you make our household SO much fun with your intensity, tenacity, and your big beautiful heart. we look forward to celebrating your birthday at the trampoline park soon!


love,
mom


your stats at age 10: you are 58 lbs. and 53" tall.
you are just about to grow out of size 7 clothing and into size 8. you wear a size 3 shoe.




disclaimer: i felt compelled to put in that trump reference because scout and i just heard him in an interview and OMG - it's truly pitiful. it's still shocking to me that this man is supposed to represent our country. i wish i could pack up and move somewhere else until he's out of office. ugh.

spring piano recital: 2017

the school year just ended and there is so much to capture.  
the boys had amazing end of the school year exhibitions,
one in particular that BLEW my mind and reminded me why we 
opted out of traditional public education and chose a project-based
charter school for the boys. the discussions and projects these kids do
is truly amazing. {more to come on the this}


today's post will focus on the boys' recent spring piano recital.
this year was extra special as we had grandma {my mom} in town from florida.
she hadn't been to san diego for a few years due to both construction projects
at our home that made it difficult to host guests, and she has been experiencing
some health problems. fortunately, she felt great leading up and during entire visit with
us which was wonderful for all of us.


this was the third year we hosted the recital at our home. we enjoy hosting as it's easy
and it helps their instructor, as the music studio where they receive lessons is too small.
we rented 25 white foldable chairs and set them up in the living room facing the piano.
the boys' teacher, mr. patrick, arrived 45 minutes earlier to help set up the food and to warm
up some of his vocal students.


finn and scout worked hard memorizing their piece the weeks leading up to the
recital as their teacher prefers they don't rely on their sheet music {although he has it}.
he believe it shows commitment and without sheet music, pianists typically play with
more feeling as they aren't bogged down looking at their sheet music.


so without further adieu, here are the boys performing their pieces.  scout played
thinking of you by june montgomery, and finn's piece was titled stephanie's waltz
by randall hartsell. and as grandma gerber noticed, both boys forgot to wear their shoes - AGAIN!
this was the second year. since we don't wear shoes inside the home, they just forget to put them on.
oh well, they are so cal kids - usually barefoot or in flip flops so maybe it's fitting. *wink*  

mr. patrick and the boys

a special guest was in the audience - grandma













it's great to be eight





scout benjamin gerber,

today is your 8^th birthday, and i want you to know how much i enjoy being your mom and how much we love having you as our youngest family member. every day is a blessing because i get to watch you grow, learn and explore.  when i look at you today, here are 8 things i see: 

1.   You've matured so much over the last year. 
the changes came so fast – you lost your front baby teeth and the permanent teeth that took their place give you a whole new look….a big kid look. you grew physically a few inches – you are leaner and taller and you grew in other ways too.  you've become more confidant and can now look an adult in the eyes when they speak to you and you to them. {we'd been working on that for some time}. you communicate your feelings more appropriately now when you are upset and this is a BIG change from your younger years.  finn shared with me that he noticed too.  you also help around the house more which is a big help to our family.
 

2.      You still devour books. 
since the tender age of 4, reading is something you have enjoyed. you get to experience adventure, danger, new places and people and so much more through the books you read. keeping new material on hand is a bit challenging for your dad and me, but we do our best.  we visit the library often and if they don't have what you need, we have books sent over from surrounding libraries to our neighborhood library. you always have a series you are reading, as well as a list of what you want to read next.  this is you scout….an avid reader who prefers books over video games. your favorite series is still harry potter, and it was no surprise you chose it as this year’s birthday theme.  other book series you’ve enjoyed this year are the city of sparks, fablehaven, and the secret series.  though it’s been years since you needed me to read to you, we still read out loud together almost every night.  i’m not sure who enjoys it more…you or me.  regardless, i hope it lasts for many more years.  tonight, we will continue reading king arthur and the knights of the round table. you are enjoying this classic so much!

 

3.     Your favorite food is pizza with pepperoni and bacon.
you love bacon and asked your dad to order a pizza with this combination months ago and now it's your favorite takeout pizza. some of your other favorite foods are crispy chicken, mangos, blueberries, edamame, boiled eggs, ice cream with lots of sprinkles and breakfast burritos from taco surf.  you eat one at least once a week with your dad and brother and sit on a grassy knoll overlooking the pacific ocean.  it’s become a weekly tradition. 

4.      Your friends are important to you. 
since 1^st grade, you’ve had a ‘bestie’ and his name is spencer.  you two share so much in common, and more importantly, you two complement each other.  developing deep friendships takes effort, time and dedication and seeing you practicing it so early in life is a beautiful thing.  you have 2 other great friends and this year you chose to have this small group over for a birthday sleepover. it seems age 8 is the year the parents of your buddies are ok with letting their children have sleepovers. you've been anxiously awaiting as you watch your older brother having lots of sleepovers.

 

5.     You are a competitor. 
whether it’s swimming laps in the pool, scoring goals, beating your brother in a footrace or trying out for jr. guards (JG), you want to do well and you push yourself hard.  when you tried out for grommet guards, your swim test wasn’t timed. even so, you made sure your dad timed you during all your practice swims and on tryout day, you asked the instructor to time you while he was timing your brother. you ended up with a personal record that day and was so proud of yourself.  whether it’s academics, playing the piano, or doing any sport, {soccer, tennis, hiking, rollerskating, biking, tennis, or surfing}, you give it your ALL. 

 

6.      You are sensitive.
when you’ve had your feelings hurt, there’s no hiding how you feel.  you wear your emotions on your sleeve…whether it’s fear, happiness, sadness, anger or excitement.  your dad says you are a lot like you mom in this way. it's true.  when you were younger, you struggled finding appropriate ways to express some of your feelings. you've made such strides this past year.  we celebrate that you are sensitive scoutie, because it means you care deeply. it also reminds the family to be more aware so we can understand and love you better. that's what life is all about anyway...loving people well.

7.    Soccer has become a passion of yours.
you've always enjoyed the game...even at age 4 when mom was 'attempting' to coach your team. it wasn't until last year that something clicked. your motor skills improved, you developed a better understanding of the game, and completely fell in love with it. it was a beautiful thing to watch. you wanted and needed more than recreational soccer and asked if you could tryout for competitive soccer. after lots of thought, your dad and i agreed. you made the riptide U9 team and since joining, you've improved so much from last year.
 

       on the days you don't have practice, you ask your dad or me to take you to a local field so you can practice. we usually take turns.  i love it because it gives me alone time with you...something i don't get much of during the week. i should mention you wear soccer jerseys almost daily, and your germany jersey is your favorite! for whatever reason, germany is your favorite team in the world.  you follow their national team on the sports channel and cheer against the usa whenever they are playing us. it makes game time really fun at the gerber casa. 

 

8.      You love to learn.
early on, your interests seemed to be mostly what finn was interested in. i worried about your being in your brother's shadow or feeling like you were in his shadow. with finn being so vocal and having found his passions young, i badly wanted to see you find your interests and get sense of who you are away from him.  this year, you have found your way and you are soaking up every opportunity to learn about the world.  since i can't take you on trips around the world, we use reading as a way of expanding your world scout.  

those that don't know you well, are sometimes surprised to learn that you are our most studious son. you enjoy every subject at school and want to be challenged in all of them.  when you learn something and feel like you have it down, you are ready for the next challenge...you beg for the next challenge.  before you started kindergarten, you announced to c and me that you were going to complete your kindergarten curriculum on-line as well the 1st grade because ou always want to be full year ahead. you did it, and have done this every summer.  you enjoy online learning so much that you have gotten upset when we ask you to get off the computer. you don't understand why when you are doing something "educational".  {educational or not, you don't need to be on electronics for hours a day}

scout, these are all qualities that i see in you and celebrate every day. you live and love in a BIG way and that big heart of yours inspires others to do the same. happy number 8 sweet blue-eyed boy.

love, mom

~ i almost forgot to share your stats. you are 49" tall and you weigh 49 lbs.

It's gr8 2 b 8! {that was scoutmaster}

super boys

at the art for from the heart event a month ago or so,
there were SUPER cute centerpieces in the middle
of each of the round tables.

and what were the SUPER centerpieces you might ask?

they were photos of the SUPER explorer elementary
children in superhero capes and masks.
{for parents, there's nothing cutter than our kiddos}

of course this was a fundraiser so the photos were
for sale and of course we bought these.

finn oliver {age 9} - faster than a speeding bullet

scout {age 5}- he said he had laser eyes

the entire event was themed around explorer's
SUPER kids and SUPER staff. there were life-sized
superheros to pose with, games, raffles and lots of food.
some of the adults even wore super hero costumes.
the event was tons of fun!
i'm anxious to hear how much the event raised.

my girlfriend jen is in the midst of planning a
superhero birthday party for her little guy and
she sent me a this photo a few weeks ago.
this will be the invite picture - SO cute!
{she is a talented photographer)

keith bennett

i hope you had a great weekend!  

c was in sacramento for an architecture thing
{he helps write exam questions for future CA architects}.

while daddy was away, the boys and i stayed busy with a 1st birthday party, 

a long bike ride, fort building, warrior training, and a camp out {in my bed}.  

always a treat for them...a tougher sleep for me.   

superheros

sometimes being a brother is better than being a superhero
~ marc brown

finn recently went to a friend's birthday where all the kids were asked to
come dressed as superheros. i thought it was such an adorable themed party!

a generous mom friend donated her child's old halloween costume for finn to wear.
the costume was 'dash', the character from the pixar film the incredibles.
if you haven't had the pleasure of enjoying it, rent it!
it's fun even for adults and will keep you laughing.

finn put on the costume this morning and ran around the backyard acting
tough and asking if he runs FAST like dash (quickness is dash's super power).

scout ran around after his big brother mimicing his every move and trying to keep up.
eventually, he opted for a hug and to sit and watch him from the backyard deck.

fortunately, my batteries were charged this time and my camera close.

finn oliver (aka 'dash')