that's what boys do

a few friday nights ago, c and i sat in the kitchen catching up on life
while the boys played in their bedroom. we had no idea what they were up to,
but we could hear them laughing and having fun.

their 'fun' progressed to more noise and i commented that perhaps i should
go check on them.  c said i don't hear anything breaking, let 'em play.
after another 10-15 minutes and progressive noise,
i couldn't resist.  i had to see what they were doing.

i walked into their bedroom and found them BUTT NAKED pillow fighting.

this is the only 'decent' photo that i could share. *wink*

they were having the time of their life and didn't even notice me.
{even when i came back to snap a few photos on my cell} 

when i shared with c what i had seen,
he smiled and said " that's what boys do".
i guess is all i could say as i chuckled envisioning c and his 4 brothers
naked and pillow fighting as kids. it's definitely a BOY thing.

oh how i love little boys and all their silliness.

~ later they told me they didn't start off naked,
they had clothes on when the started out, but they got really
hot so their clothes came off. of course.  that makes perfect sense. life with boys....oh how i love it!

thanking heaven

today i am thanking heaven for this boy who is ELEVEN!




finn oliver

i look forward to making this every year on your birthday.  
here are ELEVEN thoughts on you, mr. finn oliver.

1. you are officially a tween!
a year ago today, you asked if you were a tween.
i said one more year and today, at eleven, you are there.
you are on the cusp of becoming a young man finn.
some days you show the typical signs of growing up - seeking out quiet places to sit alone,
but other days you are still such a boy - on the floor with scout building or playing with legos, making elaborate forts with every blanket we have, and having pillow fighting naked.
{that's for a separate post}.

2. science and space still fascinates you
you can't get enough of either subject and ask for new books or to be taken to the library often when you've exhausted the resources you have. your father introduced you to radio lab and science fridays years ago on public radio and you try not to miss an episode.  {you still watch nova too}.
you have a thirst for learning finn and we do our best to keep that thirst alive in you.  we have lots of jobs as your parent, and this is one of 'em.

3. you're older than your years
since you were born, you're father and i have said you are an 'old soul'.  from early on, you were never typical finn...in any way. road trips and cross country plane trips were a breeze - you'd sit quietly and watch back to back full length movies without a peep. {all we had to supply was an extra laptop battery}. your attention span was beyond that of someone your age and if we engaged your mind, you were easy. it's the same today.  if i had to put my finger on another word that makes you older than your years today, it's self discipline. this serves you well in everything you do finn - from homework to piano practice to how you spend your free time. {i wish i had your level of discipline}

3. your favorite food is still spaghetti
you'd be happy to eat this every night of the week. throw in some red sauce and meatballs and you are in heaven. {french toast and sausage is still your favorite breakfast}

4. you are excited about starting middle school
though your father and i thought you might be a little anxious about starting a new school in the fall, you haven't shown any signs.  you talk about it openly and often.  you are most excited about having a new science teacher, joining the science club and meeting new kids who share your passion.

5.friends
one of your closest friends {joshua} moved away this past summer and you've missed him so much.  you stay in touch with him and remain close to the same group of boys you've known since kindergarten and 1st grade.  you may be small in size, but you are respected by your peers, stand tall and are a leader among your friends. as you get older and your friends become even a bigger part of your life, we hope you surround yourself with kids who make good choices and have similar values.

6. you are 52" tall, weigh 55 lbs and still have blondest of hair
we wonder if your hair will darken when you hit puberty?  you are still slight, but it doesn't bother you in the slightest. you casually told your dad and me, that you are the shortest in your class but it didn't matter because "having intelligence and being kind is what's important".
i agreed, but i rate kindness higher than intelligence. {although being intelligent isn't a bad goal to strive for finn}.  i secretly enjoy that you are a size 7/8, can fit into cute pjs from the carters store, and that i can still give you an occasional piggy back ride.

7. you are good with young children and dogs
the patience you show with your high-spirited brother may have something to do with your ability to tune into the needs of little ones and animals.  i will never forget being at my wits end with scout one weekend, and you walking into the room saying "i've got this mom, you can go".  you said it calmly, respectfully and with such intent that i walked out of the room and let you have it.  ten minutes later, you come to me saying "scout is calm and is resting in bed with patches {his sock dog}. you were a miracle worker that morning and continue to be a great brother to scout.  friends and neighbors with younger children observe your special talent and have asked when you can start babysitting. 13 we say.

7. you are not a sports kid
you've made this declaration to your father and i many times when we've encouraged you to kick the soccer ball around with your brother or asked if you wanted to try playing soccer again.  you pass. you would much rather build, read, design or spend time thinking than play team sports. you are a lot like grandpa shappard in this way.  still, you understand your body need to exercise {like your mind}, so you swim often, ride your bike and agree to take tennis lessons. we've learned individual sports seem to suit you best.

8. science fiction is your favorite genre 
you no longer just read technical books/manuals, you now read fiction too! after discovering the enders game series and the martian, you are hooked.  you'd probably read only sci-fi if it weren't for your teacher requiring you to read other genres for your 5th grade class' 1,000 book challenge.

9. you are a lover
though you often are like spock of star trek - intelligent and oh so logical, you also have a heart that knows how to love and feel. this combination is not always easy to come by and my hope is you continue to be comfortable showing affection even with so much science in your head.  scout needs your compassion and affection when he gets angry or sad.  your father and i need your daily hugs too. being able to love openly and freely shows vulnerability and is a beautiful thing finn. my hope is you hold onto that part of yourself forever.

10. sense of humor
as logical as you are, you also have a great sense of humor.  i see it with your little brother but even more with your friends.

11. you make the world a better place
your kindness, thoughtfulness, concern for the world your live in, and those you don't live in yet{mars}, remind us all to love life and to live bravely and boldly every day.

i am thanking heaven for you today finn oliver.

happy birthday.

birthday planning

it's been a busy start to 2015.

we've been reading ALOT around here,
finn has 42 books to read this year in order to reach his class'
'1,000 book challenge' {he's currently on book 32}.  i've been babysitting
for girlfriends, watched scout race derby cars with the 2nd grade friends
last thursday, and preparing for finn's upcoming birthday party
which is just around the corner.

this year he chose an usual but really fun theme - ALIENS! 
i wasn't surprised as extraterrestrials fall into the category that
he is fascinated with these days and he's already had a rocket
and mars/space party.

though he believes in alien life forms, he doesn't believe they
look anything like the the 'greens' or 'greys' of Hollywood.
still, he said they would make for a pretty cool theme.
my thought was it will make for easy decor and an easy cake for
mr. gerber. {he will appreciate not having to be in the kitchen all day}

i jumped on to etsy to see what 'alien' party printables i could find. 
there was only ONE set of alien invitations that would work for an
almost 11 year old {the rest were for kids no older than kindergarten}.
i showed to finn and crossed my fingers he would approve.
he said "that will work", and that was that.

here is the ALIEN invite that went out this week. 
cool and a tiny bit cute too.

 

~ and here's a funny that kinda goes with the topic.
last week finn came home and shared that his art teacher asked his
5th grade class to draw what they thought an extraterrestrial might
look like. the kids {like i would} drew traditional grey or green hollywood
aliens and a few were one-eyed or antenna-type creatures.

finn drew a single celled organism {microbe} and told his teacher that
it was most likely aliens exist in that form.  he said she looked confused and then  
knowing this wasn't the intent of the project, he quickly told her he would draw a
human science ship that takes the microbe back to the lab for analyzing.
she said she was 'satisfied' with this and left it alone.

that is finn..so literal. it would go against everything he's learned to draw
this green 'hollywood' alien.  I was almost speechless when he agreed to
the birthday invite. 

i think this kid is ready for middle school....

derby day

the long awaited day came when scout and his 2nd grade friends
took the derby cars they made and walked/drove them over to the
grassy park in liberty station....just 2 blocks from his school.

with the help of some parents, the students had spent a few afternoons
building {and decorating} these cars and were anxious to get them outside.

scout was excited to 'race' his team's car as he was elected by them to be in the
driving seat.  when i asked if it was because he fit best in the car, he assured me it
was because he was the BEST driver.  *grin*

whatever the reason, i was excited for him and made sure to take the afternoon off
so i could be there.  i arrived just after lunch and the kids were just pushing their
cars around.  they were having the time of their lives!!

as for the race, well, there was never one 'official' race.  the kids all took their
cars over to the largest hill in the park and they raced down it over and over.
the kids all took turns driving.  as a driver, scout won a few and lost a few and
had a smile on his face the entire afternoon. 

what a memorable day we had together.  i don't know about scout, but this  momma
will treasure it for years to come.

~ the far right pix is scout and his bestie spencer. the two are inseparable.

 
 

sweet holiday cards: 2015

early on, it used to be me who would make a fuss over holiday cards,
but now i'm joined by the boys in being excited to open and read them.
when a new one arrives in the mail, c is sure to see it and he too enjoys
the photos, especially when the parents of kids get in there too. finn asks
if he is related to someone he doesn't recognize, and scout looks to find a
place to hang the new card. the cards make us smile and remind us of our
friends and family far away {and those close by too}.

some of the holiday cards are simple store bought cards, others have a special
special quote, many have sweet family photos, some contain a long letter full
of details of the giver's year. sometimes we get one that is usually creative.

this year's most creative card came from our friends debbie and eric,
who recently got engaged.  they reenacted the famous photo from 1945
that was taken in time square.  oh how I ADORE it!! it was taken right in
San Diego's bay, with the midway in the background. 
{this one is definitely a keeper}

my favorite card homemade came from scoutie. 
{he made in art class at school}

he explained that it took him a very long time to punch
out all the black and white dots and glue them on the card. 
i bet!  i still have it displayed...it's sitting on top of the piano
where it will remain a few more weeks. the other holiday cards
came down last weekend. {c asked if those were staying up until valentines}.
*grin*

learning empathy

don't worry wilson, i'll do all the paddling.
you just hang on.
- chuck noland, the castaway















a week ago, the boys and i gathered in front of the tv
to watch castaway. finn had heard about it from a friend
{survival skills are important to his age group}, and asked
if it was "an appropriate movie for him to watch".

mmm. c and i tried to remember the movie and what might
have given it a pg-13 rating. it had been years since we'd seen it.
then i remembered that imdb has a 'parent guide' that breaks down
questionable content in movies so parents can make informed choices
about what their kids can watch.

after reviewing the parent guide, we decided to watch it as a family
and keep an eye on scout during the plane crash scene.  this is where
we thought it might be a bit intense for him.  it turns out we were wrong.
very wrong. the plane crash was suspenseful, but nothing that caused him to
cover his head or run out of the room.

it was the scene where chuck {tom hank's character} was on the raft
in the ocean and woke to discover that 'wilson' {the volleyball who had
become a dear friend to him while he was alone on the island all those years},
had slowly come untied and drifted off into the ocean.

when chuck discovers him missing, he is some distance away.
he tries to swim out to him but exhausted and has to swim back to his raft.
he's heartbroken and cries, while apologizing to 'wilson' for having to leave
him behind.  it's a very emotional scene.

as we all sat staring at the tv,
we heard soft sniffles coming from scout. 
he was tucked between c and i and from my position,
i couldn't see his face. c and i turned to each other with
puzzled looks and i mouthed "is he crying?"
c looked at him and shook his head yes.

we cuddled him in tight between us, let him experience the strong emotions
he was feeling without saying a word.  it was a surreal moment for both
c and i.  we had no idea this part of the movie would affect him at all.

it was one of those quiet thoughtful moments that parents have when
their children surprise them.  it made me feel both reflective and happy. 

empathy is a complex emotion...having the ability to imagine how someone
else feels and respond with care and concern is a beautiful thing
{and not always easy for 7 year olds}. our scoutie is growing up.
 
~ finn almost opened his mouth to chuckle when he heard his little brother crying.
i gave him 'the look' and he knew better.  the next day in private, i talked to finn
about scout's reaction during that scene and how it was something for us to celebrate. 
some grownups have difficulty with it...or have learned to suppress it. finn replied
"i know mom.  it just surprised me...i didn't think scout was that mature". 

i think scout surprised all of us that night...in a good way.
he's learning empathy.

happy 2015

wishing you and yours an amazing 2015!

 



 

where did the year go??

 

i look back on 2014, and though there have been bumps in the road,

i feel blessed and grateful for so many things. 

 

i am grateful for a  job that i enjoy going to every day,  friends...old and new,

my family {including my large and warm extended family},
being a mom to two terrific boys, and having a husband who helps bring fun,
adventure and a never ending passion to our family.
i'm excited to see what 2015 has in store.

~ we had a full house over the holidays and i'm excited to record about our time with
auntie jen and auntie leslie and her family. we also had a little family-friendly new years
bash at the house a few nights ago, and i got to see maddy yesterday morning before she heads
back to college. it's been busy busy.  more to post...be patient with me.